Hi everyone!
I have well and truly fallen from the wagon (in disgrace I might add). I have been trying to lose weight on my own. It is just not happening. In fact I now weigh the heaviest I have ever weighed! Disgusting!
I keep setting myself up to failure all the time. I seem to be stubbornly set on a course of self destruction.
It all came to a head this weekend. We had visitors over for a dinner party and hubby was showing photos of our trip to New York.. I am usually the one that takes all photos (so that I cannnot possibly be in any photos). Imagine my shock when there on our large TV a side on photo appears of this really disgusting overweight person with more double chins than Buddha (sorry not meant to offend anyone!).
I thought to myself - gee who the hell is that, I don't remember taking that photo and wow I have that same shirt. Then someone asked me what I was doing in that photo. I had to look again - yep!! it was me and I was doing a cross stitch!
Yuck I had that sick feeling to the stomach.
So today I have made a commitment that I must keep coming to this website and I must do "honest blogs". I just have to get real. I look disgusting. I feel disgusting and hence I think I am disgusting (you know the old if it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck... then it must be a duck).
So today I have restarted my life. I went for a 10 minute walk (or waddle), and then came back to lay down and catch my breath (how did this happen?)
So I am now off to have hot lemon drink and begin the journey again.
I just wanted to let you know that I am back. In need of as much encouragement as possible.
I hope you all get off to a good week.
Lily xx
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Comments
29 June 2009 - 10:15am — Juno
Lily, please come and join us in the Spring challenge, it isn't too late. You will find in the centre of the home page an explanation -or go to the forum, you will find the challenge there, it is the best thing that has happened for me.
29 June 2009 - 11:15am — Gwen66
I agree with Juno, Lily. Joining the challenge seems to the be thing that has got me going again. It's like I'm having to be accountable and it's given me the burst I really needed. I also went back to the Getting Started guide and I am really trying hard to follow the first 2 steps. Once I have them ingrained in my brain, I shall continue with the rest of the steps, but I find the first 2 steps are very helpful.
Well done starting with the 10 min walk, if you do that every day, by the end of the week you won't need that lie down. Good luck Lily, we're all rootin' for ya!
29 June 2009 - 1:28pm — Nick
Just take it slow, the weight did not magically appear overnight and wont magically disapear over night. This will take time and will take some effort but what you put in you get out!
Read through the get started guide, print it out and paste it onto the fridge if you have to. Find a picture in a magazine or online of a healthy woman that kinda looks like the you you want to be, stick that on the fridge and look at it ever time you go to it.
10min walks might not seem like much to start with but thats what I started with and now can run for ages! start with 10min, then 15min, then 20min ect ect and before you know it you will be walking about 1 hr each day or so and it wont seem that hard.
If it all seems like its too much then slowly cut out the bad foods and increase the good, you dont have to go from eating bad to eating like a rabbit overnight. you can still enjoy your treats but in moderation, eventually you will want to cut them right out of your diet or at least only have them once in a blue moon.
Just remember to remind yourself that you are worth the effort, you deserve to have the life you dream off and you can do this!
29 June 2009 - 3:16pm — JellyC55
Dear Lily ,
I would have said the same as Gwen, June and Nick...all very sound advice..
Its small steps to recovery.....You have drawn a line in the sand by stating how you feel, and by starting to walk... gradually over time you can increase the walking and as Nick says make small dietary changes that will eventually bring you back in line...
There is one dictum of the Betalife program which I love and that's
"NO GUILT" Guilt causes your cortisol levels to rise and therefore your weight..
HEY MIZ LIL!!
29 June 2009 - 7:20pm — piratejennyYes you - welcome back! And ditto what everyone else has said!! Either have a crack at the challenge as June suggests, or just start small and build up as Nic has done and wowee - look at her now!
It's worthwhile going to Nic's blog and reading her story all over again PLUS she's brave enough to post photos, so you can see for yourself that it really can be done,
Really good to have you back and how's your Feral? Mine's good and about to head off on first OS trip!
xox
Thank you all
29 June 2009 - 10:25pm — lilyFor your support and enthusiasm. I will check out the mini challenge and see what that is all about...although I think the challenge is for me to just get back on track.
I had a very grungie day today (started off well, but flagged somewhat and dived into the chocolate at tea time!) Oh well maybe by tomorrow I'll make it through the day without chocolate.
29 June 2009 - 11:46pm — Gail
Hi Lily
Good to see you back. You will make it with our help. I too, was disgusted with myself and have got rid of some weight in the past two months. When I took my photo to put up for the 12 week challenge I thought it was revolting but put it up because the next photo I get has to look a lot better.
So, you can walk for 10 minutes. That is great. Keep at that until you can increase the time or intensity. Slowly make changes to your diet. I think that if we sometimes try to change the whole thing at once that that is where we come undone and end up giving in to our cravings.
For me, after the first week of eating salad for lunch I was totally over it and never wanted to see another salad. But I perservered and just changed what I put into it. I quite enjoy it now.
30 June 2009 - 8:08am — Nick
lily, are you eating enough protein in the mornings? i find that if i dont eat protein for breakfast by the afternoon i am looking for snacks but if i have my omolete which has protein in it then i cope really well during the whole day.
another one is omega-3's, try adding both to your diet and see if that helps
30 June 2009 - 10:50am — Diana
Hang in there. We all know how it feels. Everyone has awesome ideas here. Just start off small and those small goals will add up. Take Care
30 June 2009 - 11:52pm — Nell
Hi lil I have fallen off the wagon too. Maybe we can climb back on together.
Hang in there. U can do it!